Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Finding the Perfect Catchphrase

Having now been in the television business for more than a year, and having worked as a Weekend Sports anchor at my current job for more than four months, I've decided its time to start adding new "catchphrases" to my repertoire. After I walked off set on Monday night having just unveiled a new catchphrase, that an estimated zero people in the audience got, I started to think about what makes a good catchphrase? Leading to the question: what would be my Top Ten Catchphrase list of all-time??

Before I establish any ground rules I have to make the distinction between play by play announcers and network TV anchors. Namely that play by play announcers call the action of a live game while network anchors call the highlights well after the games have concluded. Thus, gems from Marv Albert ("He gave him the facial"), Harry Caray ("Holy Cow"), Johnny Red Kerr ("Three Blind Mice"), Gus Johnson ("The Slipper Still Fits", among others), and Vin Scully ("High fly ball into right field, she i-i-i-is... gone!!!") to name just a few are all ineligible. With that out of the way we'll move onto my next criteria, since I'm 22 years old I will only include catchphrases from around 1990 until present day. The final rule is that an anchor can appear only once on the list. Without further adieu, here is my list of the Top Ten Catchphrases of All-Time* (1990-now), along with my thoughts.

10. Larry Beil - "and aloha means goodbye!"
-I remember this from 2nd or 3rd grade, was concise and funny the first couple times you heard it, plus it had staying power.

9. Stuart Scott - "They call him the windex man because he's always cleaning glass."
-Pretty hilarious the first time around, but, like most Stuart Scott catchphrases, it got real old real fast.

8. Rich Eisen - "and Carlos Delgado...he Del-GADDD-it."
-I was a big Rich Eisen fact back in the day, (on a side note he dated a teacher of mine in high school, Ms. Hammer) and I must say this was one of my favorite catchphrases back in Sportscenter's prime in the late 90's.

7. Craig Kilborn - "Do a little dance, make a little glove."
-Craig Kilborn was an innovator and an original, he was part of my favorite tag-team along with Dan Patrick.

6. John Anderson - "He gave up the cigarettes but he's still smoking."
-A Mizzou grad, so he had to make the Top Ten, he's now the face of SC and I find him pretty entertaining.

5. Scott Van Pelt - "Don't bring kool-aid to no gin party!"
-I feel that Van Pelt is currently the funniest anchor at ESPN, and not just because of his way with the ladies, but due to his self-deprecating sense of humor and the plethora of pop culture references he works into his sportscasts.

4. Keith Olbernamn - "He will drool the drool of regret into the pillow of remorse."
-Another one of my favorites from the good old days of ESPN, does a great job on MSNBC along with his duties on NBC's Football Night America. It was pretty unintentionally hilarious how he and the rest of the NBC Football crew skewered Eli Manning and the Giants for blaming Tiki Barber for his disruptive force on the team, then Eli leads them to a Super Bowl win.

3. Dan Patrick - "You can't stop him you can only hope to contain him." / "En Fuego."
-I couldn't just pick one Dan Patrick catchphrase, both of these were just too good. Patrick hands down has to be the best SC anchor ESPN has had, his radio show was/is just as good if not better than his TV work, and his interviews are some of the best in the business. Plus, he's mentioned listening to the Grateful Dead with Bill Walton , so you know he enjoyed his youth.

2. Kenny Mayne - "and the players are gay...and joyful"
-Kenny is one of the more creative ESPN anchors, plus he was in my favorite this is Sportscenter commercial. The one where he and Stuart Scott are coaches in the "Big Brothers, Big Sisters" basketball league, and Kenny is yelling at a kid to shake off an injury, "Get up, your parents signed the permission slip.

1. Brian Collins - "Boom goes the dynamite."
-What more can you say about this kid, hands down one of the most excruciating things you can watch on television, yet he somehow lived to see another day.

I'm always in search of a new catchphrase and am more than happy to take suggestions. In college I had a buddy who insisted on me saying "He gave him the goose", so I worked that into a sportscast for him. But, having "He gave him the goose" as my catchphrase could only take my bugeoning career so far.

Now, I challenge you the reader to post your favorite/funniest catchphrase or e-mail them to and at the end of the week - Sunday March 16th (assuming I find one to my liking) I'll pick one to say on-air - the week of March 17-21(as long as its PG rated). On this blog I will post the link to the sportscast in which I say your catchphrase and give you a shout out on the blog.


Atencio said...

How could you leave out Dan Patrick's En Fuego? Top 3 no question. I suggest you use Doom Hammer.

Lil' A said...

He makes speedy Gonzales look like regular Gonzales.